Duncan's ipad homework 11-6-12

Duncan is trying - or interested - in a way that I have never seen before.

The ipad can be constant between home and school.

His homework, reading and talking, has opened something.

Spending time with him, has helped us both.

Debra and Ardene have helped alot.

The typing. That the words mean something; it makes sense to him.

The calendar with our events. The calendar at school.
Typing the date into the ipad.

Walking.

That's a word that now has meaning.

Running! That's his favorite part.

Wow, sitting here typing this and got text message from his teacher that he got off the bus kicking, scratching and hitting!

real communication

September 8, 2012

A couple of days ago, I was locked in the kitchen with Duncan, which has been a really good strategy, by the way. He enjoys having his i-pad to which he is growing more attached. [on a side note, though, as much as he enjoys it, when left alone with it too long, he tore it out of it's protective casing, cracked a corner and scratched the face.

Anyway, it is nice being in there with him. I do kitchen and laundry chores. And he has virtually unlimited access to the pantry.

So, I ask if he wants a drink. I ask if he wants Nestle Quik, as he hasn't had it in a while.

He pushes it towards me, a nudge that means, "Yes, do that."

I stop and say, "Hot or Cold?"

Looking inside the door with the sign language symbols taped to it, I am happy to see that one of the pics has an actual pic of a cup of hot chocolate. It also has a sketch drawing of a person signing hot.

I point to the pics of hot and cold.

Rather than pointing as he might normally do, Dunc taps his two fists together.

I'm confused.

I point again, he repeats his motion.

It's the sign for cold!

Yeah for Dunc!

destruction

"It's like what you would do to someone, if you hated them: break into their house and fill the drawers with water, so they get mold and stuff."

On discovering - the daily for the past months - puddle of water in the silverware drawer.

Brett thinks he missed us.

He slept with me on the couch last night and has been smelling my shoes like crazy. lol

He has destroyed many things today: his fountain spout, the drawer, etc

but all with glee.

Autism in Literature

In literary analysis, there is the archetype of the noble savage.

I have seen some analysis in the media of current uses of autism in story lines that compares the autistic individual to the noble savage.

There is always this romantizaton


Keifer Sutherland tv series



Disability - "Flowers for Algernon"

Steinbeck _Of Mice and Men_ : kills him at end [like in Beloved - would rather slit their throats than have them taken to live in torture]  I remember Brenna spoke that before she knew the book ended that way. It's the same as Brett's driving off a cliff scenario. And it's a fantasy that let's him continue to fuel his quest for survival and more than that to live this life.

Doc Ricketts - or Doc- let's the boy get arrestted finally, because he saw the boy couldn't live in the world.

Of actual Ricketts, Steinbeck says that he hated cruelty for cruelty sake, but for self preservation or to put another out of misery, he would kill.

One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest

Sleep

For some reason, Duncan wouldn't sleep through the night last week. Two nights he wouldn't fall asleep and Brett stayed up with him until after 2 am. Then the next night, he fell asleep but woke up about 2 and I got up with him.

June 9, 2012

I wrote a long note on Duncan's ipad Wednesday about how he peed in his room and is now tall enough to move furniture and unscrew lightbulbs from the canister lights in the ceiling. He broke the lightbulb and had glass in his mouth.

Someday I hope to get all the musings and writings in one place.

Anyhow, today, he peed on a couch cushion from the wooden bench that Brett and Ronnie made for him. This cushion cover was just washed and replace yesterday.

So frustrating.

May 16 2012

Took pics of Dunc this morning.

He looks so handsome in his vintage looking polo.

I let him choose which shoes he wanted. Yesterday, when I couldn't find his shoes, I put him in my old green and blue checked Vans. So cute.

And he knew what it meant when I said "choose!" in the voice I have for years.

He put them on himself.

He made a rush for some chips this morning. Knocking things over in the way.

I took the chips. Pointed to the sign for chips and made him pick up the bottles and other things that he dropped along the way.

I can see many possibilities for the i-pad.

It's not being used that much at school. Maybe Ardene is using her phone.

But I had the moment - like I've heard Ardene describe - when I realize, "He is ready to move on. He's bored looking at that school morning visual schedule."

It's the timer that has been most noticeable necessity. I like it. It's a place holder between Duncan and I.
I have so many things going on at once and he has no self-agency.  There is no busi-ness or task or consistent behavior for which he can be held accountable.

Or so I've thought.

But here's the thing, Duncan is flexible. He definitely now knows that he can only eat in the kitchen.

He gets no more yoo hoo, but water in creaky squeezey bottles has everyone drinking more water and it's the only thing he can take back to his room.

So, we use the ipad and the calendar. I should learn Boardmaker.

Maybe keep the calendar on the ipad rather than print out. Yes. I think so.

I will have a daily planner that is his. Time of day is something I think he could understand.

I-prompt (schedules - this is a sort of planner)

JJ loves

I was going to work and noticed the words "I love you" written in the dirt on my side mirror and on the back window.

Signs

Link to IEP lists

Juice
Milk
YooHoo
Chocolate, Strawberry
Dress
wipe
egg
outside
Next - what next?
After
wet/dry

or

thirsty

In Practice: routine and visuals

Visual Calendar - add time

Episodic Memory

Bathroom: word for poop or pee
                 toilet, washing hands
                 bathing

Teeth
Hair
Face
Dressing
Belt
Jacket
Socks
Shoes

5-21-10

Didn't go to the lake today, but came home and Duncan got to walk out in the wind and play in water. Hose at pump house, front of house; then bucket of dog water. Swings. Dog chews dead rodent.

But now there's crying

Go to dog pen - [so this is how the dogs got out] - the bucket was emptied. I had just filled it.

And Duncan fleeing the house with his pants down.

JJ has placed her Vetrinarian Barbie on the grave of dead kitten.

Research and non fiction

Maverick Mind

Exiting Nirvana

Sacks

Grandin

Catherine Maurice

Lovaas

Gutstein

"How Autism Ages"

_Boy Alone_

Dr Shaw

Duncan, No!

I was at Gena's for maybe 15 minutes. Duncan knew there would be an inflatable pool in backyard and like before - a 3 or so foot pool is in the back. We let him tip the sides, flood a little.

He bounced on the edge.

And eventually, he bit the hole.

It's me who takes the blame.

It doesn't matter how sorry you are - I am - their property is destroyed - well not beyond repair - and now Charlie has a chore to do.

This one of those ways that this disability warps the rest of the family. Drives you more and more into your own home.

Malcolm joked about it yesterday, at the St Paul's camp out; he joked about what "could" happen.

"I hope" said Malcolm "that he doesn't pull his pants down and pee like he did at the flea market."

I'd forgotten about that one, but I remembered when he did it i the planter outside of Pirates of the Carribean.

"I'll be like," continued the Malcolm invented story of Duncan doing this there, at M's own school, "Who is that kid?", shrugging his shoulders

And you'll be, he looks at me, "Malcolm get your brother."

And we both laughed.

Like our story about M's kids visiting Duncan someday, "Uncle Duncan No!" when Duncan tries to grab their candy or whatever.

helpful critque

People who say what they think about Duncan, for real.

Brenna - [don't be a hero. there is no afterlife. don't sacrifice a whole family - institution is made for him. on the other hand and at the very least, have times when his door is locked: a schedule.]
Cecilia - [you let him get away with it. you shouldn't let him have a drink unless he is supervised.]
Ardene - [he has to clean up for himself, even if you come back to it later and again and again. It has to be him]

messages or just messes

its hard not to take the destruction perso ally.

routine. we have been trying to discover his routine since he was less than two yeRs old.

insteD, he seems bent on never ever having a routine.

returning home st tje end of the school dY, i turn on the water for hom usinf oliers outog tje key pad locked door.

he took it to tje dog pen and soaked it all. he slipped on pasr jis sisrer to my bathroom and artacked lipsticks eyeshhadows cremes liquids

poor jj

couldnt wait to poop in the partially disabled toilet.

messages or just messes

its hard not to take the destruction perso ally.

routine. we have been trying to discover his routine since he was less than two yeRs old.

insteD, he seems bent on never ever having a routine.

returning home st tje end of the school dY, i turn on the water for hom usinf oliers outog tje key pad locked door.

he took it to tje dog pen and soaked it all. he slipped on pasr jis sisrer to my bathroom and artacked lipsticks eyeshhadows cremes liquids

poor jj

couldnt wait to poop in the partially disabled toilet.

In a day

I walked in to an adult day facility and talked to a twenty something about a new career.

Admin over two adult living facilities.

I started using the iprompt timer with duncan.

Adding times to his schedules and calendars would be a good idea.

Must contact Kleitman regarding Ardene's placement.

Went to dentist yesterday. It's kind of awful, but I don't know how else to go about having a dental exam for Duncan.

He looked at me, knowing that he had to lie in the papoose.

It was hard.

Now we have to make an appointment with the regular doctor to clear Dunc for surgery because he needs to be out for a filling.

Smells

I can tell Duncan is peeing in his room. I can smell it, but it's hard to determine where since the whole concrete floor is wet with water smuggled in with ballloons, whose colorful rubbery carcasses litter the puddled floor.

He knows I know too. And it makes him laugh.

If I smell cleaner of any type, it might be my first clue that he's dumped out the brand new jug I've just bought.  Walking towards the bathroom and breathing in a "suspiciously mighty" gust of mint, likely leads to the discovery that he's splashed mouthwash or ssqueezed out the toothpaste. Perhaps taken a bite of your deoderant.

Often too, he smells of onion or something else he can access from the kitchen.

Also, something seems to have died in our attic or air ducts, so that also sucks.

Even though we have child locks on all the cabinets, Duncan got a brand new bottle of dishsoap from under the sink and squirted it all over his room, rubbing it even on the glass in front of his tv and his windows.

Later he snuck out the dog door and played with the hose on the side of the house. He opened my car door and soaked the back seat and floor.

Earlier this week, someone left the fridge unlocked and he poured about a 1/3 gallon of milk on his mattress, which still stinks.

Duncan is sick. Perhaps a low fever - lethargy.

Today he came to sleep in our bed this morning and wiped his nose on all the pillows.

Looked at the ipad together.

Review names in sign.

tell me

I thought I'd made a mini break through asking him to tell me rather than show me - even though he is telling with sign language - because show me made him hand lead.

But just now I signed (and spoke) Duncan want - pause - then I put my hand behind my ear, because - in this case - he was begining to mouth who who or yoo hoo.

So he nods - as in yes Ducan want - and then he put his finger behind his ear.

Rendering the whole thing meaningless (?)

negotiations

Duncan and I reinforced the use of sign for balloon.

It seemed impossible to communicate that the helium tanks were empty, though.

Today, it is cold. Duncan got into our bed and refused to be pulled or otherwise coerced out of the bed. I showed him his old Feb calendar and the new one for March.

Then, when he looked me dead in the eye and pushed his own weight int the bed, I said "5 minutes" he looked at me - ears at attention. Pause.

I step away; gesture to his ipad

"want this"

he nods.

i get it to home screen and he taps "Toy Story" book.

What is it?

Duncan's only word is his approximation of "yoo hoo"

But we stopped buying them

he was squirting them out.

throwing them down as soon as he got them

add choices

in iprompt, we can't edit. i'll have to make a new schedule and delete the old one, if we add choices.

Right now it is set up for some kind of drink.

It has been this way for about a week or more.

We bought some capri suns which are in the squeezeable pouches, but he squeezed them out too.

sometimes he drinks hot choc, sometimes not.

For his nightly melatonin pills, I give him water sometimes.

Is this what caused his aggravation today?

I didn't just bring him a drink - or a yoo hoo when I saw he was awake.

So was he just aggravated?

I thought, well, he's going to have to make a choice. I used sign to ask what he wanted. Did he want a drink?

Many times he led me to the pantry. He - oddly - even insisted I set my coffee down.

Twice, just as the door was unlocked and opened, he pushed it shut and led me to either or both the fridge and the spice cupboard.

He uses sign to ask for salt. Then points to Vanilla. I am trying to let him know which extract he is asking for with sign and pics, because a couple of times he gets lemon.

He puts it in the palm of his hand, sometimes with a pinch of sugar too.

He still continued to ask to be let into the pantry.

Once just grabbing a straw and running.

Finally, he stood, looked around and very deliberately pointed to - even touched - the can of powedered cocoa.

Ok! I said. Thrilled at this true communication.

I made it and brought it to him.

He pushed it away. Pointed for me to go.

Dammit.

Later, with the hot choc on the counter next to him, he leads me to the fridge. He points to the choc syrup and milk.

No I tell him and show him the hot choc.

He yelps angrily, grabs the drink and runs off.

Shit, I think. I hope he doesn't spill that all over.

But I don't have time to sit with him every second I have other things to do.

As horrible as it was, I haven't even recorded here that every other moment that we weren't going through the "drink" trials - there was a whole other thread of inquisition.

"Hurt?" I asked, pairing it with the sign for hurt.

I signed hurt again. "Ears?" I asked. "Tummy?" I asked. "Hurt?" I asked.

In the end, he finally drank the hot choc. I toileted and dressed him, then brushed his teeth.

He got on the bus and seemed fine.

If I get duncan dressed too early, he'll just get undressed.

I feel as if I am still caring for a toddler. He was up at 5 or earlier and I woke up too. Not his fault that I was awakened at midnight and couldn't go back to sleep until 3 or so.

It was Brett having his usual midnight snack, but I did bounce up thinking I was catching Duncan making a water mess.

supports

Been using the iPrompts app for iPad. It's really more to be sure that he can understand us than it is for him communicate with us, though that is the ultimate goal.

The picture with inset of sign language has helped us.

Sign is his best hope of communicating with anybody, even though his signs are just approximations.

I used the calendar Ardene made in Boardmaker to indicate that this is a Friday and we'll have a party tomorrow.

broken glass

NO LIGHTBULBS! [in addition to the NO WATER PLAY!] appears to have spiked Duncan's interest in lightbulbs and glass.

The day I put the lightbulb sign up next to the hall light fixture, D moved a stool over and removed both the sign and the lightbulb.

That was Friday and we just found the bulb this (Sunday) morning

Ok - just returned from extracting glass from his foot. Showed him the lightbulb PEC the whole time.

water damage

The cabinetry around the kitchen sink are damaged: bubbled, seams on the sliding shelves pulled apart, swollen.

When I open the cabinet to get a pot or pan, it's filled with water.

There was mold in the wall behind the sink.

His obsessions cost us so much